Saturday, February 26

5 Reasons Women Should Learn to Love Football

Dear Women,
From about mid-August until early-February you're going to find yourself pretty lonely every Sunday and Monday night while your boyfriend is having the time of his life at the local bar. The heart-wrenching/Dreadful/Never want to think about question will eventually cross your mind. And the answer is yes, he is cheating on you. And her name is Football.
Now the way I see it is you have 2 options. You can either chose to suffer for part of the year while your boyfriend enjoys all that Football has to offer OR you could chose to give football a legitimate chance and save yourself from inevitable loneliness. I guarantee a majority of you will like what you see.

Here are 5 reasons to give football a shot...

1. Because your boyfriend loves it & you love him. Don't forget all the stories he has had to listen to about how bitchy Jessica is, or how fat Amanda got. News flash: you're boring the shit out of him. Or how about all those times you made him sit through the Bachelor (we've all done it). Or that wretched week that comes every month where you're crabby, bloated and develop the appetite of a hump-back whale. Need I go on?

2. It's the best time to host a party and invite your favorite friends over to the house. Not to mention it's the perfect time to test new recipes. Who better to serve experimental treats to than testosterone filled men, screaming at the TV, who most likely washed down their breakfast with a cold beer ("all in the name of game day") & who are not only working up a sweat, but also a mean appetite. They'd most likely eat anything at that point.

3. You kill 2 birds with 1 stone by traveling to some pretty exciting cities, while your boyfriend gets a kick out of traveling to see his favorite team. Who could complain about visiting New York, Florida, San Francisco or Denver?

4. It's the perfect excuse to buy a cute new outfit, or 2 or 3. Who says that just because you're at the game doesn't mean you can't look cute? Plus, the "need a new cute outfit" rationalizing is where women are most creative, "But Chris, I don't own anything green! How am I supposed to support our team if I don't wear green?" (while you shove 11 green articles of clothing into the oven. You know he won't find it there).

5. Most importantly, because it is a phenomenal game. Once you understand the rules, and you have read over the bios your boyfriend has sent you of all his favorite players, you can't help but form a little attachment.

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